Hetalia Headcannons
by bittersweet02
Summary: The title kind of says it all... is listed as finished but I might add new chapters if I feel like it or get writer's block on my other stories.


The Bad Touch Trio has movie night every Friday and just sit and cry/eat ice cream

Japan and Hungary stalk every date the nations have (with cameras of course)

America knows every language spoken in the 21st century because of his country's diversity

You will never get Prussia to eat a peep. Ever.

Just like England will never eat the green bunny ones

Sweden and Finland actually take turns "Receiving"

Greece and Japan have had a secret relationship since the 1800's

Canada and America actually have a strong brotherly bond

Japan has a Puella Magi Madoka Magica shrine in his closet

The male nations CAN get pregnant, because they have to represent both of the genders of the people in their country

America and Hong Kong aren't trusted with fireworks. Ever.

Hungary and Japan go to every anime convention

Prussia has amazing memory. Photographic actually.

Germany wears contacts and only puts on his glasses when around Prussia or Italy

America has the most followers on Tumblr….but nobody knows it's him (and every nation follows him without knowing its him)

Japan, France, and Hungary are the perviest nations there are (But are also the best matchmakers)

America tried bribing England for Harry Potter spoilers

America and England bond over The Beatles (And they both cried for 2 weeks when they broke up)

America can bust out any rap song you can name

Columbia sells America cocaine

Nobody can compare to Russia's ballerina skills

Everybody assumes that Italy is the "I'm so gay I fart rainbows" one, when actually Germany is

For the first 200 years that they were friends, Italy thought of Germany as a brother and protector, whereas Germany has always loved him romantically

Germany has cheated on Italy with Mein Schticky Friend before

Iceland is obsessed with bananas

Italy always doubts he's a true catholic, because he's hopelessly in love with a man

Canada is terrifying when you get between him and his maple syrup (Even more so than Russia)

Germany and Denmark secretly bake together every Thursday

The Italy brothers despise Olive Garden. Every time they're in America, they go in to one of the restaurants and breaks in to the kitchen to yell at the chefs.

Every country is guilty of several (or more) murders

Italy+Sugar=a horrible day for a certain German

France hates being called a rapist. He keeps up a strong façade in front of everybody else, but at home he cries because of the horrible insults

America is torn between if gay marriage is legal or not, but England is his reason for leaning on the marriage equality side

Poland is one of the only completely straight countries

England is VERY kinky

Belarus saves up money to buy Ukraine new bras and buttons/needles/thread and gives them to her whenever she can

Not only is Romano involved in the mafia, but Italy is too (Germany doesn't know)

Italy is a very angry drunk

So is America

Switzerland and America bond over guns

England, China, and Japan all sit for tea at least once a month

England and France visit Joan of Arc's grave once a year

France will never actually LOVE anyone the way he did Joan

The BTT sometimes just sit and cry because everyone thinks they are either pedophiles, rapists, and self-worshiping idiot

America is addicted to America's Got Talent

America is also addicted to YouTube

Prussia is actually really insecure. When he calls himself awesome, he's actually just assuring himself

When Canada is drunk, he will swear like a sailor, and beat you with his hockey stick if you get him even remotely mad

When Italy is angry, he turns worse than Romano

Romano and Italy both thought they were sinners for the first 100 years of their romantic life

America has two scars on his back from 9/11

America also has a scar all the way around his waist from the American Civil War

Japan actually created the anime Hetalia after getting bored at a meeting

Fem!America plays with Barbies almost religiously

Canada can literally drink straight up syrup

America always makes fun of China for not using YouTube

When America is being a jerk at meetings, all of the nations sit in front of him and eat Kinder eggs

After all of the recalled toys, nobody trusts China to make toys

America is an avid watcher of Adventure Time

America doesn't know of England being a punk

Italy is the possessive one in the relationship

Never make fun of Finland. Do you want 6-foot ex-Vikings and a very insulted sharp-shooter against you?

Finland is the second worse cook out of the nations, England of course being the first

Canada holds his liquor better than Prussia

Germany still has the push-broom Italy gave him/HRE, except he doesn't know why he has an emotional attachment to it

Canada has England's temper, when angry of course

America refuses to leave England in the same room as a match without him in the room to supervise

Italy and Romano have gone as Mario and Luigi on Halloween plenty of times

Germany imagines himself as a girl a lot, because he knows that Italy is somewhat ashamed of himself for loving a man

Germany also likes to imagine himself and Italy as the original Rapunzel characters

Romano doesn't completely hate Germany, he just doesn't want to lose his brother to him

America learned Spanish from Dora The Explorer

Whenever America gets mad at England, he takes his tea and dumps it in the toilet

America hates the word "fag"

America cries whenever he watches Pocahontas, he thinks of before England found him, and then when he did find him

Pocahontas also reminds him of his mother

Ancient Rome was friends with Sumer

England was drunk when he named half of his cities

The Nordics cosplay Frozen

Fem!England cosplays Alice from Alice In Wonderland

And so does all of the fems with their country's fairytales (i.e. Germany as Rapunzel, America as Pocahontas, France as Belle, China as Mulan, Russia as Anastasia)

Italy has a knife hidden in his jacket, boot, and white flag

Belarus, Ukraine, Liechtenstein, Belgium, and all of the other female nations have a Girl's Night once a month

When England knows that America didn't do his paperwork, he sneaks in to his room and does it (America doesn't know this and just thinks it's aliens)

England has a strange love for the color pink

Columbia and America sell Liechtenstein drugs (without Switzerland knowing of course)

Austria and Poland are the only semi-straight countries

Russia has Gynophobia because of Belarus

"randomly" at meetings everybody's ringtones change to Canadian Please and their phones go off

When France and Canada argue, they yell in French and nobody understands what they're saying (after they realize that France is talking with somebody)

England is still waiting for his Hogwarts letter

Japan refuses to watch or read the Hunger Games because it ruined Battle Royale

Hungary reminds Japan of Renge from Ouran High School Host Club

Finland refuses to drink, but when he does, he can hold his liquor better than anybody

Sweden is terrified of Finland during snowball fights

The Nordics make an awesome boy band

Fem!Japan is in love with yuri

Likewise, Male!Hungary is in love with yuri also

Italy and Romano refuse to eat American gelato

Or American pizza

Or American calzone

Or basically any traditional Italian food America tries to make

Basically nobody will eat the food America makes "traditionally"

When a nation gets angry enough, they turn in to their 2P

Sweden has literally spent three days sitting in a corner not moving or speaking because Finland said he wanted his space

HetaRoma actually happened

Germany knows he's Holy Rome, he just doesn't tell Italy because he believes that the Italy he knew before died and this is a new Italy to fill "her" place

Italy hates clocks. You could guess why.

Every nation has an erogenous zone in their hair. Some hide it with gel like Germany, others hide it in plain sight like England (his eyebrows), and others just don't hide it

Nobody fully trusts Germany, thinking he's going to start World War III

Japan wrote this list


End file.
